Lost and Found

“I lost it,” she said as she stepped outside the bathroom stall.  

“Uh, you lost what?” I asked, a bit hesitant to hear the answer from one of nine young girls I’d been asked to counsel for a week of high school summer camp.  

“My tampon,” she mumbled in a long sigh of defeat. 

“Ah boy…wow,” I responded, having never had “this” conversation before.  

“Do you mean it’s, um, well…how do I say this — up THERE still?”  

“Yes,” she replied.  “I can’t find it – but I’ll look for it later ‘cause right now I’m going down the zip line” she continued, as she sauntered out the cabin door…  

Now, I’ll be honest, I’ve lost some things in my life:  teeth, a ferret, weight, jewelry, a passport, my marbles, true love and even a set of cut open handcuffs and a dirty prison uniform.  But if there’s one thing I’ve never lost, it’s a tampon!  

I bit my lip trying not to laugh in front of the young lady ~ I certainly didn’t want to make her feel dumb by telling her it’s physically impossible for a tampon to disappear like a juvenile who’s run away from home and can’t find his bread crumb trail.  “Just pull the string” I wanted to shout. But I didn’t. I didn’t have to… 

Because the next day, she skipped towards me with a big smile on her face.  “I found it!” she exclaimed in her best Christopher Columbus voice.  

“The camp nurse removed the applicator for me and said the tampon should find its way out eventually.” 

“The applicator?”  I gasped. “You mean to tell me you had the cardboard tube that encases the tampon lost in your vagina for the last 24 hours?  

“Yes” she smiled naively. 

“Wow, I guess now I know why they call this particular camp ‘Lost Canyon!’